some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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