OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
