i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
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Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
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he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
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