What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
