True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
