I'm jealous of your bromance
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
It’s A Miracle These 21 Promiscuous People Don’t Have STDs
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
These 27 Infuriatingly Annoying Habits Will Ruin Your Day
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program