grinding to god bless the USA? really?
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"