That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
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