this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Randomize
