Well douche your snatch and let's go!
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.