can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
