quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Randomize
