I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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