i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
I want to fling myself into the sun
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Randomize
