he shaved USA in his pubs
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Randomize
