they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
