dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
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