what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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