3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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