Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
it's great music for shaving your balls
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
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