You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Floor bacon is actually really good
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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