Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize