that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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