please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
We have so much sex to catch up on
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
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