the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Help. Why am I so naked?
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