if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
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