so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
25 People Confess Their Favorite Way To Annoy Their Significant Other
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
These 21 Women Share What Sexual Harassment In The Military Is Really Like
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"