you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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