Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Randomize
