She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
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She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
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I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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