Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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