There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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