All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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