If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Randomize
