How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
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I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
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I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
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