What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
