As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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