I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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