i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
The ass gains better be worth it
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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