I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
