I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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