Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize
