Kiss
Puke
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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