I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
