You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
