This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Randomize
