your thong is hanging out like whoa
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Those nachos came to me in a dream
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
