weddingsv make me drug and hornr
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize
