Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
I bet he comes in French.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Randomize
