Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
