If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Randomize
