Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
Randomize
